Tag: dnd

nottyouraveragegoblin:

You know, I see a lot of posts out there about dumb shit that players do and while all of those posts are incredibly valid, I feel like this is dumbass DM erasure. I dearly love every story about bards who seduce the final boss and warlocks with sugar daddies and all that BUT I think DMs are greatly misunderstood to all be these serious controlling entities who just want their players to follow through with their perfectly planned scenerios. Here’s to all the dumbass DMs out there who:

– forget their NPC names and constantly make up new names for unimportant recurring NPCs when the players see them in hopes that they wont remember

– plan a whole dungeon around one (1) spongebob reference that they really wanted to fit in

– accidentally give two NPCs the same name bc you just pull from a list and you forgot to cross it off

– choose to homebrew everything bc they have an Artistic Vision but the vision is just that you want there to be three gnomes in a trench coat selling sketchy magical items somewhere in the setting

– use the same dumbass voice for every NPC but with different 90s surfer slang for different characters

– make just awful items and make their players buy them (I’m currently working on the “Ross From Friends” tramp stamp of +1 AC)

– realize they only have 28 minutes before the next session to plan and instead make text posts on tumblr.com

Anyway if any DMs want to add onto this with some dumbass shit they’ve subjected their players to feel free

eskfurb:

onefell:

I made furby a small creature in my dnd campaign. There are a few different subspecies but most have large eyes, two legs, and beaks. They have the ability to mimick spoken words and a limited capacity to understand language. Mostly they like to PARTY and DOO DOO DO DO DO DOO

PUT FURBY IN YOUR D&D GAME

yashas-strong-arms:

disasterhumans:

zombiekiller2:

nonbinaryvexahlia:

so after sam “I stealthed so hard I’m playing with the McElroys right now” riegel’s obscene roll of 38, I decided to figure out what the absolute max stealth roll a person could roll in a non-homebrewed game of Dungeons and Dragons 5e is

let’s get the basics out of the way- i’m assuming this is a level 20 rogue, no multiclassing because i don’t want to give myself that much of a headache, who rolls a 20 on the die. They’ve maxed their Dex to 20 at this point, so this gives them a 25. any self-respecting rogue is not only proficient in stealth, but has expertise in it, so they can add double their proficiency bonus (+6 at this level) to the roll- bringing us to a total of 37.

we’ll assume this is a well-read thief; a Manual of Quickness of Action increases  Dex scores by 2/modifiers by 1, so we’ll retroactively add 1 up there. 38. Ioun takes kindly to well-read adventurers; we’ll say she’s gifted them with an Ioun Stone of Mastery, which grants +1 to proficiency bonuses with the added bonus of having a rad fucking rock hovering around their head. Our thief adds 2, because of expertise. 40. Stone of good luck in their pocket adds +1 to ability checks. 41. they’ve also got the Stealthy feat, which lets them add their proficiency bonus to stealth checks again. Another 6 plus the Ioun Stone’s 1 brings us to 48.

Finally, this rogue wouldn’t have gotten far without a druid or ranger in the party, who might have been so kind as to cast Pass Without Trace. Add another 10. 58. Fifty-Eight.

I’m sure I’m missing stuff somewhere that would make this even higher, but if I asked for Stealth checks and someone at the table called off 58 I think I’d be legally allowed to shoot them on the spot.

If they’re a mark of Shadow elf from Wayfinders guide to eberron with the greater dragonmark feat they can add a d6 to that for a possible 64 and a level 20 bard gives a d12 inspiration for a 76

And if another party member had the Guidance cantrip hhe rogue can add another d4 for a max of 80

the player clips through the table and is never seen or heard from again

YO, what is the “oath of the turnt”? Love, an oath of the ancients paladin

curriebelle:

http://homebrewery.naturalcrit.com/share/Bkbk8-O-a-

Yo fellow holy dude! It’s a home brew oath based on 1) the wisdom of Brian Wayne Foster and 2) gettin turnt. Highlights include the tenet that “Life is too short to wear boring socks” which basically means “I am in such an intense state of YOLO that I can now summon cars from hell and heal you with high-fives”, and the fact that instead of Turn Undead I get Turnt Undead which can make skeletons dance in place. IT’S LIT.

mickmercury:

fiascodownunder:

soaringsparrows:

“The players all are told to create mid level druids with animal companions. After creating their characters have all of the druids be kidnapped and the players must rescue them as their animal companions.”

— (via probablybadrpgideas)

op change your url

There’s a fun one-page rpg not too different from this called The Witch Is Dead! You play as the familiars of a witch killed by a witchhunter and now you’ve got to go get your revenge on him to bring her back to life (or, like, just to have revenge, because he sucks).

You can get it for free here!